Centre for Fun and Families – Parallel Groups
IYPP PROJECT
6. Case Studies
Names and other details changed for the purpose of confidentiality.
The following cases have been selected to illustrate both positive and not so positive outcomes for families.
Case Study 1: DC
White, single parent with history of domestic violence. Three teenage children. Self-referral by parent though supported via social services.
Police and social services involved as middle son violent and aggressive towards mother and sister, threatened mother with knife. Son accommodated by paternal grandparents (no contact with father). Contact with mother but still refusal to respect boundaries, and threatening behaviour.
At the beginning of the programme DC was very low, suffering from depression, seeking help from a psychiatrist. She felt very scared and fearful of son, not wanting him to return home, stressed because social services were putting pressure on her to have him back.
Parent attended a LWT group where the majority had experience of domestic violence and/or abuse and this helped her to feel not so alone. The group were all female apart from one man who was very supportive. Because there were a lot of mental health and low self-esteem issues in this group, group workers realised they needed to concentrate on building safety in the group and building up the self-esteem in the first couple of weeks, this meant we had to run an extra session. We encouraged the group to give each other positive feedback and used appreciations at the end of each session to bolster self-esteem. Our aim was to promote resilience and work with the impact of abuse. We wanted to create a safe environment where parents could get support from each other and feel less victimised, as well as demonstrate that praise and positive feedback would help both themselves and their teenagers in overcoming difficulties.
DC was quite reserved in the group at first as there was another member who she knew quite well and was unsure of regarding confidentiality. We addressed this by attempting to build trust between them and re-iterating the ground rule around confidentiality.
DC remained fairly negative that her son could change, and the programme could really help, during the first 4 weeks. Over the course of the programme things seemed to be getting worse for DC, with contact visits going badly and problems with her other son increasing, resulting in him leaving home to live with his grandparents.
As the weeks progressed DC fed back about some situations where she had taken charge and asserted herself with her teenage sons, she received lots of praise form the group about this, which seemed to build her confidence and determination.
Three members of the group had previously attended a Fun and Families group for younger children and were very positive about the programme and this helped to overcome some negativity and hopelessness amongst some of the parents. Parents were not afraid to ask each other for help.
In addition some one-to-one support was given to DC, as group-worker provided transport to and from group and this created an opportunity for DC to be listened to and offload things that were troubling her and disclose previous experiences that were coming up for her as a result of the group-work.
Towards the end of the programme, DC became a lot more positive about the possibility of using strategies from the programme. DC joined a parents support group run by members of the group and also decided to join the parent volunteer programme.
In the meantime her son was attending the ACWA group for young people. Again this was a group where the majority were facing mental health issues and there was a lot of depression in the group. This group was notable for it’s lack of fun and sense of humour. S was one of the oldest members of this group and he was not very forthcoming in speaking out in the group, however he did see the programme through and changes were reported by his mother.
DC has since become an active parent volunteer and has successfully helped to facilitate a parents’ LWT group alongside experienced group workers. She has reported major improvements to her family relationships. Both sons have moved home, S who attended the programme has stopped threatening and aggressive behaviour and is much more respectful and helpful around the house. Her other son is having some problems due to a disability but generally things are much clearer and previous conflicts around money have reduced.
Case Study 2: RM
An Asian, divorced mother with a history of domestic violence. One 14 year old daughter. Self referral by parent though supported via Education Welfare
Very isolated family, negative relationships with grandparents and relatives. RM reported long history of emotionally abusive relationships resulting in low self esteem and depression. These feelings were mirrored in her daughter who was also depressed, self-harming, over-eating, and not attending school. The relationship between mother and daughter was very negative. The daughter was demanding money and goods from mother, effectively bullying mother. The mother was worried financially regarding debt and was long-term unemployed.
It was difficult for her as the only Asian woman to integrate into the group at first. Her feelings of isolation made it hard for her to approach others and initiate friendships. In addition we found that the rest of the group didn’t welcome her as well as they could, perhaps because they saw her as different. The group-workers addressed this by trying to bring her in from the edges, modelling an interest in her and what she had to say, making a point of welcoming her and bringing her into the group when she arrived late and by giving her appreciations in the group.
We also became more mindful of who we paired her up with, choosing one of the parents who was more aware of cultural issues and the skills to offer support and listen well. RM reported finding coming out of the house and being with other parents helpful, and seemed to find the group beneficial for this reason (ie. breaking her social isolation) however she rarely reported trying or having any success with the strategies.
There were lots of feelings of blame towards her daughter and an internalisation of herself as the victim, so that she found it very hard to give her daughter any praise, or to stick to boundaries.
At times RM seemed not to be able to take anything from the group on board and reflected a hopelessness that her situation could change. On the other hand she did seem to be gaining some self-confidence from joining the group and this seemed to be helping her in her determination to gain some employment.
RM found it very difficult when the group ended and although we tried to refer her on to a number of specialist support and encourage her to attend the parent support group, she didn’t appear to follow this up.
In our view RM would have benefited from attending another parenting group, or some additional one-to-one follow up intervention. To overcome her social isolation a group involving other Asian single parents would have been helpful, as well as access to a culturally sensitive counselling service to address some of the mental health issues. She has contacted the Centre on a number of occasions since to seek advice about her daughter’s behaviour or to offload and again has been signposted to relevant agencies, but seems unwilling to follow these up.
Her daughter, despite completing the programme and interacting well with other young people, was not really changing her behaviour. The relationship between mother and daughter was stuck and really needed a longer intervention. The daughter remains at risk from non-school attendance and mental health difficulties.